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A portmanteau of Pederast and pedal, this describes a subset of the genus MAMIL.
The Pedalrast is an elderly lycra-clad male commonly found atop expensive racing bicycles. In this case, however, not only does he cruise the English countryside in shorts so tight every wrinkle on his aged scrotum is visible, he also stops in small market towns to enjoy an artisansal coffee and ostensibly take in the Georgian architecture.
This provides cover for soliciting the attention of pre-adolescent boys before whom he parades his doughy figure, convincing himself as he does so that he's remarkably well preserved for a man of his age.
Essentially a sex offender on two wheels, he should be run over on sight.
If like me you're generally averse to violence, console yourself that the sound of crunching carbon fibre heralds another boy's unmolested transition to adulthood.
"Oh god Derek, there's a pack of pedalrasts approaching. Whatever drives them to display their wares thus?"
"Oh, I don't know about that Susan. The chap at their head looks remarkably well preserved for a man born in 1899".
When, in the absence of women to be condescending towards, one of two or more men temporarily assumes the role traditionally occupied by the female in such an exchange. The mansplainee, as it were.
"No, no, no Derek, not at all. What Foucault actually meant by that was that academia itself is the panopticon."
"Of course I knew that John, I've a DPhil from Cambridge after all. Just because you went to Oxford is no ground for manonmansplaining."
"I say, don't get cross. Though you do look so jolly adorable when you're angry."
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An ice cream now available in the UK. Misperceived by many as an example of cross cultural confusion it is in fact an incisive stroke of marketing genius and a penetrating insight into the perenially adolescent mindset of the average Brit. Who, after all, in these islands wouldn't purchase said product simply to bemuse and harass a hapless teenage vendor?
"How much for a bum bum mate?"
"Make sure it's from the back of the freezer, I like bumbum best when it's hard."
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