Central Jersey

An area of NJ that no one has heard of until they meet one of these "Central Jersey" inhabitants. Disbelief and denial are common reactions (believing that NJ is divided among a North/South, NYC/Philly paradigm).

What's actually happening here is that, being above the South Jersey divider, inhabitants of "Central Jersey" are in reality in the same sphere of influence as the folks in North Jersey. They have the same culture: NY sports, guidos, juice heads, grenades. They share the same hatred of Philly, hoagies, jimmies, wooder, water ice, and our Philly/South Jersey "O's". However these people become disenchanted with North Jersey, realizing how undesirable that lifestyle is, but realizing they have nothing in common with North Jersey's rival, they try to invent a new identifier for themselves: "central jersey".

When asked what's the difference between North and South Jersey, it's quite easy to illicit many examples. When prompted, "What's the difference between you and North Jersey?" a Central Jerseyan will actually be unable to provide any examples. That's because there are none. Proving the fact, that by absence of difference, Central Jersey is in fact an extension of and shares its bloodline with North Jersey.

Trying to invent a precedent for his false belief, the Central Jerseyan might try one of these tactics:

American #1: "Yeah, how 'bout North and South Korea fighting.."
Central Jersey fucker: "Yeah it's even worse for those people in Central Korea."
American #1: "That doesn't exist..."

American #2: "Remember when Germany was divided into East and West Germany?"
Central Jersey fucker: "Yeah and Central Germany, too."
American #2: "No......"

American #3: "In the Civil War we had the Union from the North and the Confederacy in the South, right?"
Central Jersey fucker: "And the Centralcy in the middle."
American #3: "What? That doesn't make any sense..."

South Jersey resident: "What makes up North Jersey?"
Central Jersey fucker: "North of I-195, Love of NYC, saying "the city" and meaning NY, guidos, Mets/Yanks, Rangers/Devils, Giants/Jets, Knicks/Nets, and hatred of Philly, water ice, hoagies, and making fun of the South Jersey/Philly accent."
South Jersey resident: "OK, what makes up Central Jersey?"
Central Jersey fucker: "North of I-195, Love of NYC, saying "the city" and meaning NY, guidos, Mets/Yanks, Rangers/Devils, Giants/Jets, Knicks/Nets, and hatred of Philly, water ice, hoagies, and making fun of the South Jersey/Philly accent."
South Jersey resident: "Wait....that's the same thing!"
Central Jersey fucker: "No...no it's not!!"

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