DBWSH

David Bell World Series Hero.

David bell got a game winning hit for the Giants against the Angles in the WS once. Some assmongers at the Saint Louis Post Dispatch forums declared him a hero. The Giants lost the series. Hilarity ensued.

Idiot: I think Chan Ho Park might win the Cy Young.
Smart Person: DBWSH.

Norm MacDonald

Hilarious. Harsh, biting sarcasm. Former host of SNL Weekend News. Norm produced the best comeback line of all time as a guest on the Late Show with Conan O'brien. See below:

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Best comeback line
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(Conan asks Courtney Thorne-Smith what the title of her new movie co-starring Carrot Top is)

Norm: If it has Carrot Top in it, it should be called Box Office Poison.
Thorne-Smith: No, it's called Chairman of the Board. There, make fun of that. (Smith resumes talking to Conan)
Norm: *Brief pause* I bet the "board" is spelled b.o.r.e.d.
Conan: Uncontrollable laughter.

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Hosting SNL after being fired from the show
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Norm MacDonald: When the people here asked me to do the show, I've got to say, I felt kind of weird. I don't know if you remember this, but I used to actually be on this show. I used to do the "Weekend Update" news routine, you remember that? That's where I did the make-believe news jokes. That was me, you know? So then, a year and a half ago, I had sort of a disagreement with the management at NBC. I wanted to keep my job. Right? And they felt the exact opposite. They fired me because they said that I wasn't funny. Now, with most jobs, I could have had a hell of a lawsuit on my hands for that, but see, this is a comedy show. So, they got me. But, now, this is the weird part, it's only a year and a half later, and now, they ask me to host the show. So I wondered, how did I go from being not funny enough to be even allowed in the building, to being so funny that I'm now hosting the show? How did I suddenly get so goddamn funny?! It was inexplicable to me, because, let's face it, a year and a half is not enough time for a dude to learn how to be funny! Then it occurred to me, I haven't gotten funnier, the show has gotten really bad! So, yeah, I'm funny compared to, you know, what you'll see later. Okay, so let's recap, the bad news is: I'm still not funny. The good news is: The show blows! Alright, folks, we've got a great show for you tonight! Dr. Dre, Snoop Doggie Dogg and Eminem are here. We'll be right back!

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