Christian

-Stuck up, spoiled, immature, metrosexual college kid who goes to a school with a 3:1 guy-girl ratio.
-Cannot leave his room without applying hair gel and bathing in cheap cologne.
-Brags about his beer pong and raslin prowesses to anyone that will listen.
-Does not hesitate to hit females.
-Crudely and awfully attempts to emulate the personalities of others around him.
-Has not gone a weekend without his mother stopping by the dorm.
-Convicted bro-rapist
-Pizza bandit
-Better eyebrows than David Hasselhoff
-Wears the same stupid a&f shirt to parties cuz it worked on one girl...in middle school
-Only physical activity is a cheap pussy ass immatation of kung fu called vale tudo..."the UFC fighting man!"
-Spends 10 hours a day playing some shitty MMORPG
-Laughs like a emphazemic old woman
-Contemplates nestling his popped collars
-Currently half pops his collars
-Jumps when shootin pong (the fairy hop)
-Makes poor old relatives wait in his dorm while he finishes homework
-Refuses to leave the room when his roomate has his beautiful girlfriend over for the weekend
-Certified hallway roamer

Dude, when I was just sittin in my room doing my homework the other day, I smelt Christian's signature cologne seeping under my door and my ass cheeks accordingly clenched like a vice grip.

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