Mouth Beef

A temporary but uncomfortable oral condition that occurs when consuming crunchy, sharped-edged food, resulting in painful trauma to the roof of the mouth. Examples of common food items that cause Mouth Beef are: Antiseptically dry sourdough toast, tortilla chips (if eaten in great gluttonous handfuls), and Cap'n Crunch® breakfast cereal (any variety).

Sorry, sweetcheeks, I can't make out with you tonight; I had five bowls of Cap'n Crunch this morning and have a terrible case of mouth beef.

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