Corn Flute

The gaseous wind instrument which makes very high pitched farting noises when the perfect array of food cosumption, buttcheek clinching and riboflavin levels in the blood are present. Riboflavin aka rip-o-flavin is the mineral that allows for proper rectal sphincter contraction. Corn flutes may be forged by shaving your ass crack and having taco bell for dinner. Many yoga like leg positions can be tried for the perfect note. When done correctly, the corn flute produces corniferous melodies of symphonic delight. Start by tuning for A# or A sharp, but do be careful for if too much puckering is used you could experience A SHARP pain in your corn-eye. Happy cornfluting for all of the poo-sicians out there. ENJOY!

I had the most graceful piece of music fly out of my corn flute last evening. It was like I had orchestrated the bean burrito concierto. When playing high notes from your corn flute you may irritate canine ears from afar.

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Full Turd Kernel

1. A high ranking Officer (Full Bird Colonel) in the Military or member of Management who is an asshole or would be considered a piece of shit by majority vote.

2. To completely crap out, break or fail.

3. A remarkable fecal accomplishment.

1. Is that your boss, that would be he... the Full Turd Kernel himself.

2. Looks like I'm going to bed, Facebook is goin all Full Turd Kernel.

3. Damn, I just gave birth to a beast. Gotta get a snapshot of this Full Turd Kernel.

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