New Jersey

A state that makes itself out to be something great when really, it has little to offer. New Jersey boasts its beautiful shore, wilderness, its great people, and other things of the sort. Really, most of it's beaches are polluted with random garbage and New Yorkers, are crowded beyond belief, loaded with laws, and the water is coca-cola colored and cold year round. The wilderness is almost non-existent compared to other states, despite the large Pinelands Reserve (which is probably the nicest part of New Jersey). The people are for the most part very conceited, obnoxious, materialistic, coddled, and rich. Most are liberals, and drive around in some form of an expensive SUV or german sedan. Everyone praises the New York and Pennsylvania teams because NJ doesnt actually have any teams of it's own, and a good time either involves going to the mall, hanging out at the cold dirty beach, or eating. Girls here are known for hitting the wall at around 19 or 20, blowing up massively. Other problems with the state are...(you can verify the statistics through gov sites)

1. 3rd highest cost of living
2. 2nd highest state debt
3. 1st highest political corruption
4. 1st highest amount of superfund sites (toxic waste sites)
5. 51st (out of 51) best quality drinking water
6. 2nd most polluted air (NY is 1st)
7. 3rd worst traffic
8. 1st highest property taxes
9. 1st highest cigarette taxes
10. 5th highest adult AIDS rate
11. 3rd highest juvenile AIDS rate
12. 1st highest car insurance rate
13. 8th highest total illegal immigrant number (1st highest per sq. mile).
14. 1st highest population denisity

i guess i cant mention the bad without the good.....

1. 1st most trees per sq. mile
2. 12th most frequent hurricane stricken state
3. 4th best education system

New Jersey is a God awful state; when I travel north, I go 3 hours around it just so I dont have to go through it.

Jeez, did you hear that guy from New Jersey, his accent sounded like shit, he wore wigger clothes and gold, and talked alot of smack about nothing; must be rough growing up with your daddy's porsche and a ocean side mansion.

Exceptions: South Jersey (NJ south of 195) escapes most of the afore mentioned negative attributes, and more closely relates to neighboring Delaware.

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Quasar

A concept car developed by Peugeot in 1984.

specifications...

Engine: I4 16v DOHC biturbo
Power: 600hp/98 ft.lbs torque
Chassis: Peugeot 205 Turbo 16
Suspension: Formula 1 double wishbone
Drive: AWD

Look at that Quasar over there, the French actually made a cool looking car.

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Cold Lunch

The simple sexual act of forcing yourself to throw up into another person's mouth, usually in the result of the other person eating it.

I felt sick from all the burritos I ate for lunch, so I just gave Kimberly a mexican cold lunch to help me bust a nut real quick.

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Crazy Daisy

The sexual act of standing or laying next to a partner, and flailing your dick in quick frantic circular motions while pissing or cumming. The act will simulate the 1990's summer hose spraying toy "Crazy Daisy," and will leave your partner sufficiently drenched in your fluids.

I was horny, and I had to take a piss, so rather than go downstairs to the bathroom, I just gave Christi the ole' Crazy Daisy.

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Florida Speed Bump

An alligator. They're called Florida speed bumps by locals in non-metro areas of Florida because alligators tend to use the sunlight heated roads as heat rocks. They sprawl out across the middle of the road, and serve as a huge, scaly, armor plated speed bump. The bigger ones will not flatten if you hit them, it will just tear up your car real good.

Dale - "Hey Jamie, what the hell did we just hit?"

Jamie - "I reckon we just hit one hell of a Florida speed bump!"

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Montoya

verb - derived from Juan Pablo Montoya in the NASCAR Sprint circuit, it is the act of putting your car on the underside of an outside car, coming up the bank, tagging the rear quarter panel of the outside car, creating a "pit-maneuver" effect, usually resulting in the spinning of the outside car.

That cop will probably Montoya that Cadillac to end this high speed pursuit.

Looks like Juan is going to Montoya Jeff Burton again, but its okay because new politically correct NASCAR will blame it on Jeff.

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Aston Martin Bulldog

Year: 1980 (concept)

Engine: 5.3L V8 16v DOHC /Twin Turbo
Power: 600hp/500lb.ft torque
Turbo: TO4B Garrett AiResearcher Turbochargers
Top Speed: 191mph
0-60mph: 5.1 seconds
Drive: MR
Suspension: front double wishbone, rear de dion axle, anti-roll, coil springs

That Aston Martin Bulldog is so flat i could drive over it

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