Mechanicsburg

A small town in central Pennsylvania. Populated by cows, hicks , and the occasional failed writer. The kind of place you drive through once and you have seen it all. Contains: an art store covering for drug trafficking, one good coffee shop (Juice n Java) and a plethora of townies . An exceedingly boring place. Oh, and they have some lovely era architecture, except you can count on it to be decrepit and unkempt.
Notable people in Mechanicsburg are: the man who walks around with a parrot named "Merlin" on his shoulder, a man who takes pictures of everyone and gives them out to strangers on the street, and an unidentified person who rubs Vaseline on their butt and presses it against storefronts at night, leaving greasy buttprints. I wish I was joking.
If you ever get the chance to visit Mechanicsburg, don't. Seriously.

Alice: Look, a hobo biting off the heads of various small animals!
Matt: I didn't know we were driving through Mechanicsburg.

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