Cocksucker's Coffee Club

A group of sycophantic individuals who habitually take their coffe-break, tea-break or smoko in or around the environs of their bosses office in the hope of gaining favour. Composed exclusively of brown nosers, usually smug.

"Jeez, have you seen that bunch of arse-lickers supping tea in the gaffer's office?"

"Yeah, looks like there's a regular Cocksucker's Coffee Club going on there...."

Instascummer

Self-absorbed and ego-centric tourist, who is quite prepared to make every other holiday maker wait whlst they engage in a pseudo-professional photo shoot. Self-justifying on the grounds they are so much more important than everyone else and besides: this is their (imaginary) job.

Often found pulling yoga poses on cliff tops.
Typically millenial, entitled and selfish. See also influencer

"How long have you and your kids been waiting to see the waterfall"
"20 minutes"
"Ahhhhh, that's because theres a bunch of Instascummers ahead holding everyone up. I'll go and push them in if you like?"
"Thanks, I'd appreciate that buddy"

Wanker's Crown

Alternative phrase for man bun or manbun when worn by a hipster or similarly smug, pretentious twat.

"I see that guy next door is now wearing a Wanker's Crown"
"Yes, gone down the full Hipster route sadly....."

Painted Lady

Perjorative description of an effeminate male with an excessive number of compensative macho tattoos.

(Nautical in origin)

"Jeez mate, you seen all the tats on the new guy who joined our ship yesterday?"

"Yeah, but he couldn't knock the skin off a rice pudding. Painted Lady if ever I saw one!"

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Porky Blinder

Perjorative. A failed attempt to channel vintage gangster look as popularised by UK TV series Peaky Blinders by corpulent man or lard arse.

Basically a flesh ball in a vintage waist coat, brouges and a flat cap.

Origin Northern England
See also Last of the Summer Blinders

"Looks like Tubby Tucker has bought a flat cap"

"Yeah, fat fuck is reinventing himself as a Porky Blinder"