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Kong Schlong

A cheap yet powerful energy drink sold by the European supermarket chain Lidl, it goes by the name of Kong Strong. Tastes like the oil you just drained out of your engine after a 100,000 mile road trip, mixed in with some low quality cocaine and blackcurrant flavouring. Do be careful however as this is not one substance you want to mess with. Drink too many and you'll find yourself shirtless, with your huge belly hanging out as you're nearing death on the bathroom floor of an Amsterdam Hotel. This drink literally makes you feel as though King Kong has done you nicely with his Schlong. So take care with the Kong, or you'll get the Schlong.

Hey man, have you tried some of this Kong Strong?

Are you stupid? Do you want to feel the Kong Schlong?

Oh jeez, I guess you're right.

by DonLykeB March 18, 2019