Alaskan Shizzle-Twizzle

Also referred to as the A.S.T., this object of heinous hiney pleasure involves delicately shitting into a magnum condom so that you have a good six to eleven inches of fecal matter, tying the rubber off at the end, and freezing it. After six hours you remove the now rigid rod o' pleasure, peel away the latex shell to reveal the A.S.T. in all its glory. Good for all manner of vagtastic, anal, and oral play, the A.S.T. will provide hours of fun for the whole family.

Vary your diet during the days prior to the initial condom-filling in order to change the texture. We have found eating nothing but sweet corn salsa and french fries produces an A.S.T. with a great balance of sturdiness and texture.

After that last final I feel like somebody reamed me with an Alaskan Shizzle-Twizzle.

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