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n. A devious act whereby a tradesman etc deliberately includes flaws in his work, thereby guaranteeing that you will call him back sometime in the future to fix them.
One of our radiators is broken! But our central heating system was fixed six months ago. I reckon the plumber pulled a billgates on us!
24π 10π
Nasty villains from Doctor Who. As hard as the Daleks but they can climb stairs, without having to resort to johnnycomelately plot devices such as levitation!
Source from which the Borg were shamelessly ripped in Star Trek.
We are the Cybermen! Resistance is futile! Ahem ahem cough cough splutter
23π 6π
Similar to Alliteration Insults, but based on vowel-sounds instead of consonants.
16π 15π
Notice that in this song, Marie is waiting for Tony Christie, but in All Seeing I's "Walk Like A Tiger", which is also a Tony Christie song, Marie had left him for a man half his age! Maybe Tony had spent too long trying to find the place, and Marie got fed up waiting. Ho hum.
3π 2π
Prime Minister of UK 1990 - 97. Politically a failure really. His achievements include:
- in 1992 he totally fucked the economy with the the ERM debacle;
- 1993 - 1997 he sort of stabilised the economy but no-one forgave him when it came to the next elextion;
- He had two schemes to try and take people's mind off what happened in 1992. The first was the so-called "Back to Basics" slogan, which led to every Tory who had ever had an affair being publically humiliated.
- The second idea was the Northern Ireland Peace Process, which involved releasing loads of IRA terrorists from jail, in return for which the IRA has not yet decommissioned one single firearm.
- On the plus side, he invented the National Lottery, and timed important international summit meetings to coincide with major rugby and cricket matches.
Ah Mr Aherne! Why not fly over Saturday morning to have a summit on the Ulster problem. And then we can go to Twickers for the England/Ireland match in the afternoon.
84π 13π
The excuse par excellence if you are caught in the act of adultery.
Husband: YOU! What are you doing with my wife???
Adulterer: Well, seeing as I knew you were going to bone her later, I thought I would save you some trouble by doing the foreplay for you.
Husband: Oh, that's very considerate of you, old chap, you are such a true friend, etc etc
2874π 2307π
Similar to Murphy's Law, but relating to cheques to wit:
Cheques being paid into your account (at least) twice as long to clear as cheques being drawn on your account.
F*** me I have no money! Aaaaaaaaaaaaagh!
2π 4π