COCKatiel

When a man pulls out his penis and places it on your shoulder, possibly making bird/parrot noises for attention.

Bert Kreischer placed his dick on his wife's shoulder, when she'd tell the story, he'd tell them "it wasn't a parrot... It was a COCKatiel!"

S.I.M.P.

Sudden Interest in the Male Protagonist; a sudden realization that all female characters inside an animated series or american live-action film where characters suddenly and irreversibly show an unexplained attraction to the main male character, though people beyond the fourth wall can tell there shouldn't be any romantic chemistry between the two. Examples of this can be found in any harem anime or action movie

Female: I'll never fall in love, my own ambition to be independent and awesome shall never be changed!!!
Male protagonist: *shows up and does average stuff to look slightly cool*
Female: OMG I'm useless now and need the help to save me!!!
Audience watching: OMG they just ruined her with a case of S.I.M.P.