Jared

A guy that gets absolutely no maidens. No bitches. No damsels. No female significant other. Or male significant other, for that matter. He gets nobody. He is alone, and will forever be alone. He loves Friday Night Funkin' and anime, and watches them nonstop.
Hopefully, someday, he will find that special someone.

*at a party*
"Yo you seen my boy Jared?"
"Nah he's at home playin FNF."
"Damn that's too bad."

Deaddogs

Extremely similar to deadass, it is used to confirm something, since nobody likes a dead dog. A dead dog is serious.

Well to white folks anyway but-

*he falls off a cliff*
"Are you okay man?"
"Yea bro deaddogs i'm serious."
"Aight bro if you say so."