peta

Pussies
Eating
Tofu
Abnormally

I love meat, so don't fucking tell me what I can and can not eat, you bastards!

129👍 259👎

spasticle

A combination of spastic and spectacle; when one lets a particular genre of music dictate the way they dress, especially when their dress sense is horribly mismatched already. The end result has them walking around in public making themselves look like a complete retard. Goths and Emo Kids are fine examples of spasticles.

I was walking around city centre today, and saw this guy with giant black platform shoes, black baggy pants with black bondage straps, black bomber jacket with bondage straps, chains hanging from his butt and piercings galore all over his face. What a spasticle!

6👍 4👎

X-Factor

Really lame pop-music Reality TV show much like pop-idol.

Lamer: You can sing, you should be on the x-factor
Me: Shut the fuck up

142👍 64👎

trouser chicken

Figurative slang for a cock

Watch out, it pecks and will throw up when excited

6👍 6👎

dead stupid

A thief who tries to rob a gun shop is shot dead by those in the store.

The following mind-boggling attempt at a crime spree in Washington appeared to be the robber's first (and last), due to his lack of a previous record of violence, and his terminally stupid choices:

1. His target was H&J Leather & Firearms, a gun shop specializing in handguns.

2. The shop was full of customers - firearms customers.

3. To enter the shop, the robber had to step around a marked police car parked at the front door.

4. A uniformed officer was standing at the counter, having coffee before work.

Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up, and fired a few wild shots from a .22 target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, the police officer with a 9mm Glock 17, the clerk with a .50 Desert Eagle, assisted by several customers who also drew their guns, several of whom also fired.

The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons.

No one else was hurt in the exchange of fire.

18👍 5👎