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A hair gel commonly used by grandpas. Often their grandsons comment on how good their hair looks. It is often sold in jars with Ed Crankshaft's picture on them. He has been known to use it.
Nelson: (let's out a big wolf whistle) Whoah, boy! You're getting all gussied up. What's going on?
Ed: I'm fixing my hair. I'm going bowling with a bunch of the bus drivers. You know, your Uncle Rudy and your Aunt Lena and all them.
Nelson: Wow! What's that stuff all in your hair?
Ed: (starts laughing) That's my Grandpa Goo. Hey, wanna come with me? The gang's gonna flip when you use this.
Nelson: Nice! (bends his head down) Let's massage this into my mop!
Ed: (growling) That's the ticket! No grandpa is complete without a good hairdo. All you need is some Grandpa Goo!
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Showing of affiliation for any school that uses blue as a school color. But most notably used against The University of North Carolina by fans of Duke.
Morris: Hey, Duke and UNC are playing tonight mom!
Beatrice: Oh my God, they're gonna get caught bluehanded!
Morris: The Duke fans are on the prowl. The bluehands are gonna be everywhere!!
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Showing of affiliation for any school that uses blue as a school color. But most notably used against The University of North Carolina by fans of Duke.
Morris: Hey, Duke and UNC are playing tonight mom!
Beatrice: Oh my God, they're gonna get caught bluehanded!
Morris: The Duke fans are on the prowl. The bluehands are gonna be everywhere!!
A pterodactyl-like dinosaur that looks much like Ralph Drabble. Often flies around the house with sweatpants on its legs and tennis shoes on its feet. While capable of flight, the Ralphorynchus can also walk. It is often accompanied by its wife dinosaur, the Juneorynchus, who chases it if it makes fun of her exercise. As in the July 6, 2010 'Drabble'.
The Ralphorynchus: Hey honeybunch, great workout! You might wanna try a few sit ups too.
The Juneorynchus: (Screeches) You crazy dino-bird!! We don't have much abs, how can we do sit ups? We get enough on them just flying around.
The Ralphorynchus: You are so crazy! Maybe I should do all this while you eat! The human Drabbles did it the other way around. The human Ralph Drabble while the human June was working out.
The Juneorynchus: (lets out a high pitched screech) This is for your own good. Give me 20 laps around this house! And I don't mean flying! You better start jogging, boy!
The Ralphorynchus: I should thank her. Now she's got me jog-flying!
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A grandma who also works as a youth's sports coach. Often fires the other coaches and takes on coaching herself. One notable example of this happened on January 30, 2011 when Beatrice Middleton fired her son, Morris, from his Pop-Warner football team and took over the coaching herself.
Beatrice: (blowing the coach's whistle) Hey kids, Coach Morris isn't here any more. You've got yourselves a Grandma Coach!
Wilson: What on earth is a Grandma Coach?
Beatrice: It's a grandma that coaches kids' sports. Trust me, you'll like me just as much as you did him!
Wilson: I'm not so sure.
Beatrice: Trust me, it's going to be fun. I'll work you so hard you'll be begging for mercy! (blows the whistle again, yelling) MOVE IT!
Morris: Mom! You're working those guys too hard. A coach isn't supposed to work that way.
Beatrice: Oh yeah, well drop and give me fifty! (blows the whistle again, getting in Morris' face yelling) NOW!!!
Midge: Easy Beatrice, it's only your first day. You'll make a great coach, trust me!
A condition of going into seizures of jumping jacks. Often caused by nervousness or stress. These seizures, which are also known as 'jack attacks', are most often seen in Ralph Drabble when he gets nervous.
Ralph: (panting) One, two, one two...
Patrick: Man, Dad, you're all sweaty. Are you nervous?
Ralph: Yeah, I'm doing some Sky Jacks to calm down.
Patrick: Mind if I join you? I'm kinda stressed too.
Ralph: Sure! (like a coach) Ready, begin!
A jail seen in every mall. Arrested shoppers can sit in here for hours at a time. June Jails are always guarded by at least security guard taking shifts. The first use of a June Jail was when June Drabble got arrested by her husband, Ralph, for eating candy that she didn't pay for. A June Jail is fun to sit in and will always be there when you're tired from shopping. So if you want a place to rest when your shopping failed, head on over to the nearest June Jail!
Ralph: I can't believe this! You stole a malt ball, honeybunch?! You're gonna have to sit in the June Jail.
June: Well, that might not be so bad. I still got me some candy!
Necky: But you didn't pay! That was just it, you didn't pay. Over against the wall! (starts searching June for candy)
Ralph: Look, I found a lava cake. Why don't we all sit in the June Jail. This is going to be fun. This is sweet! A June Jail is so much fun.
June: Yes, it sure is. But I feel like some exercise. (she starts jogging around the jail cell.)
Necky: Wait! Are you hungry? We still got some of the cake and candy.
June: No, not right now. Exercise first, then eat. You know how Ralph is. He's gotta keep his gooey going.
Ralph: (laughing) Now, all this exercise is making me tired. I'm gonna have to sit down. How do you like the June Jail?
June: It rocks! This is one of the nicest jails anybody could go to. A couple of hours in here and you'll love money. And its all thanks to my Ralphy Boy!