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wall-to-wall counseling

A behavior correction method, in which a superior shows a subordinate the error of his or her actions by means of physical violence. Verbal abuse is optional. While primitive, it differs from blind, drunken battery in that it is initiated with the objective of eliminating undesirable behavior. Used correctly, it is utilized only when all other methods of communication have failed.

Applications of wall-to-wall counseling vary, ranging from a simple slap to prolonged sessions ending with a trip to the hospital. Like most counseling, it is of an intimate nature and usually takes place between counseler and counselee in a secluded place, though the counseler may opt to include assistants for physically fit patients. Blunt, hard objects such as baseball bats, 2x4 wood, and walking canes are occasionally included as teaching aids.

Named for the dynamic nature involved, in which a counselee is tossed about from wall to wall during a session.

For additional information, refer to WALL-TO-WALL COUNSELING FM 22-102, available from the United States Army's Field Manual Headquarters.

The new worker, Billy Bob, keeps clogging the toilets with his chewing tobacco. I've tried talking to him and reducing his pay, but he won't stop and I can't afford to fire him. Maybe some wall-to-wall counseling will fix the problem.

by Eidako July 27, 2003

169👍 18👎


gender-affirming

The irrevocable mutilation of a healthy body by injecting profoundly incompatible hormones and/or surgical destruction of organs vital to reproduction, healthy body chemistry and overall well-being.

Those terrible Texas lawmakers think kids should to wait until they're 18 and have moved out their two moms' house before receiving gender-affirming health care.

by Eidako March 11, 2022

21👍 30👎


FIFO

Abbreviation for "First In, First Out", and abstractly means that the first item placed into a container or list will be the first to be removed. The system is used by fine resturaunts like McDonalds in order to assure freshest average food quality, though it doesn't address the omnipresent "half of the stock is expired" or "the refrigeration temperature is too high" issues. It is noteworthy that many employees ignore the system altogether in favor of grabbing the most convenient box.

FIFO! FIFO! FIFO, FIFO, its off to work we go. *whistling* FIFO, FIFO, FIFO.

by Eidako July 1, 2003

146👍 53👎


spender

1. One who uses excessive amounts of currency.
2. Remote computer infiltration specialists who are in the trade for profit. Such a person isn't described as a hacker in respect to the hacker's code of ethics, which states that a one shall not use their knowledge for personal gain. Term derived from Front Mission 3.

1. My wife's such a big spender that she's going to put us in the poor house.
2. I hired a spender to get me working passwords for over a hundred porno websites.

by Eidako May 17, 2003

13👍 22👎


pediaphile

One who suffers from a twisted, perverse love of wiki collaborations. Pinko commies argue that pediaphilia is a mental illness, but it is in fact an intentional, degenerate sin against the Holy Corporation. Contrary to popular opinion, it can affect both men and women, young or old. Signs of pediaphilia include excessive time spent on the Internet, interest in learning, improved writing skills, participation in non-profit activities, and the compulsize need to place brackets around major concepts. Pediaphiles tend to congregate online in places such as Wikipedia, Uncyclopedia, Encyclopedia Dramatica, and Urban Dictionary.

Should you suspect that a loved one is a pediaphile, you must immediately destroy that person's computer and rush him or her to the nearest Walmart. Demonstrate to that person the joy of materialism and capitalism by buying as many items as you can afford. Avoid buying any computers, as they may result in a relapse of the sickness. Be sure to reinforce the concept that all human interactions should involve greed, as we are taught by the Corporation.

The only things on the Internet are viruses, porn, copyright infringement, and pediaphiles. Congress should pass a law against it.

by Eidako February 24, 2006

42👍 35👎


dick here

Instance of the phrase "click here", in which the letters "c" and "l" are placed with little or no space apart by the font, thereby forming a "d". Particularly fitting for pornographic pop-up adverts.

dick here for barely legal girl-on-girl action!

by Eidako December 8, 2003

17👍 6👎


pedosmile

Phenomenon where, when photographed, a pedophile will always have a creepy, lopsided grin which screams "I molest children". Such pictures are in sharp contrast to those of normal people, who generally have a deer-caught-in-the-headlights expression, and conventional felons such as murderers, who always frown. Typical features of a a pedosmile include tight, discolored lips, visible tounge, concealed teeth, a cocked head, twisted facial features, a bald forehead, disheveled hair, and a general aura of faggotry. Used in conjunction with other indicators, the pedosmile is an excellent method of early pedophile identification.

I was going to help that man find his puppy in exchange for candy, but then I saw that he had a pedosmile.

by Eidako March 3, 2006

534👍 92👎