Irvine

This Refers To The Town Of Irvine In Scotland. This Is A Guide For Anyone Who Has Never Been To Irvine Before. Irvine Is A Small Town With Several Smaller Areas In It:

Town Centre: Home To Most Of The Towns Homeless People. Most Notably "Wullie Socks" Notorious Stealer Of Wallets And Junkie Extrordinare. There Is a Mall Full Of Shops That Are Shutting Down And Also The Magnum "Leisure" Centre. The Goth Kids Can Usually Be Found Down Town.

Springside: Shitehole Of Irvine. Neds, Neds And More Neds. Most Of The Houses Have Lovely Metal Shutters Over The Windows And Most Of The Woman Are Pregnant At Fifteen. Home Of The Notorious Springside Young Team. Avoid This Area At All Costs. Dont Look Anyone In The Eyes.

Boutreehill: This Area Can Be Divided Into To Smaller Areas, Due To Both Gangs From Each Place Fighting Each Other. Lets Start With Cafe, The Dirtier Of The Two Areas. Cafe Seems To Have A Huge Cannabis Cloud Just Floating Above The Buildings. Full Of Jakes. Now On To Village, Slightly Cleaner Still Dirty. Not As Bad As Most Places In Irvine. Truth Be Told Its Actually Alright Apart From The High Level Of Neds.

Lawthorn/Percton: The Poshest Place In Irvine. Also The Most Boring. Everyones Grass Is Just The Right Length And Noone Does Anything The Police Would Frown Upon. Extremely Anal. No Neds Or Goths Here. Just Rich Kids. Their Not Bad People Though.


Girdle Toll: Very Average Place. A Shop, A Young Team, Some Goths. Nothing Special Or Different About It. Not As Bad As Springside Or As Good As Percton/Lawthorn. Its Just Like A Less Intresting Version Of Dreghorn.

Dreghorn: Probably The Best Area Of Irvine. Which Is A Bit Like Sayin Its The Best Spice Girl, It Means Nothing. Recomend The Dairy, Very Good Chips. Not To Many Neds Or Goths. Just Normal Kids. Not Bad.

Broomlands: A Bit Like Cafe. Again A Bit Of A Shitehole. Absoloutley Nothing To Do In This Area.

Irvine Is, In Short, A Very Average Place. Theres Nothing Differnet About It. I Personally Wouldnt Recomend A Visit. However, The People Arent That Bad. And If You Do Visit Irvine You Have To Meet Wullie Socks, He Is A Legend. Thats About It Really Just Remember Dont Look Anyone In The Eyes.

Person 1: Have You Been To Irvine?
Person 2: No
Person 1: Have You Heard Of Irvine?
Person 2: No

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