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beast mouth

That weird uncanny valley way that MrBeast has his mouth open in literally every thumbnail of his videos. Neither a gape of surprise nor laughing, or anything a real human would do except when …

B: Dude, why is Jerome in the hospital with a throat injury?
A: He *begged* me to deep throat my cock! He literally gave me *beast mouth*!
B: OK, in that case I get it. ^^

by Evi1M4chine August 9, 2023


webturducken

“A chicken stuffed into a duck stuffed into a turkey stuffed into a cow stuffed into a elephant stuffed into a whale!”

A: What did you have for thanksgiving?
B: We had turducken!
A: Hahaha, ſuckin’ hicks!!
B: And what did you have? Webturducken? Or did your mom eat the sperm whale alone again?
———

by Evi1M4chine December 2, 2010


.io

The top-level domain that used to be a fad to use for indie game projects with 1980s graphics, but nowadays lets you recognize a toxic Silion Valley start-up with the containerized framework crypto AI offerings to solve a problem, that wouldn’t be there without people like them, with more of the same.

You know… the ones with the huge stock photos and utterly useless text blurbs, that look like that of an asexual pickup artist peddling courses. The one seemingly run by 3rd-wave-coffee-sipping iDrones in skinny red plaid dungarees with black suspenders, black 50s glasses and side-combed undercut Hitler Youth / generic-diverse-curly hairstyles running the equivalent of jsLinux as their primary OS. The child of Juicero and a Musk project, not doing hardware, not software, but maybe something cobbled together from existing big projects that a skilled coder could put together himself in an evening, but it somehow presented as the greatest invention to ever save the world. Making Pied Piper look like the old and sane generation.

Not a single barefoot greybeard hacker who has worked on bare metal or Unix boxen in sight. They’re CoC-blocked.

A: Hey, have you heard of that great new thing, doteyeohh.io?
They.io made this amazing new invention that will change the world.io! The iMSmart.io!

B: They invented the … browser?

A: NO!! The text editor dot IO! It’s a platform! For frameworks! In a container! Using the new Crust language! See? You can install any scab you like! Let me just download this 128x128 pixel art animation! … hold on this is only terabit 6G… OK, … See?

B: It takes 12GB to run… a disguised Chrome browser in a disguised VM? … Why are my fans spinning up?

A: That’s just the AI gathering your neural data for Google Telemetry. It will make writing text super-easy! You don’t even *have* to make life choices anymore! Who doesn’t hate being an actual individual, right?

B: Nice OS you got there. If only it had a better text editor…

by Evi1M4chine December 4, 2022


mansplaining

A thought-terminating cliche of sexist hate-speech with the sole purpose of claiming everything that is said is wrong solely due to it being said by a man.
Its use is usually “justified” by claiming that it is only or “originally” intended to only criticize a condescending behavior of chauvinist bullies towards their victims. Even though in all of its short history, it was was never used that way. (See: Gaslighting.)

So it is really just a specific case of the general strategy of modern bullying, where narcissists with a severe inferiority complex realized they could bully others most effectively, by claiming they are the ones being bullied. As most people sadly completely fall for this, hook, line, sinker, fishing rod, fisher and the entire boat and anchor… and can be used to amplify the bullying (aka cancel culture).

This again, is just a specific case of the “eye for an eye” revenge fallacy of thinking one’s evil is not evil “because” somebody else did evil first, even and especially if the other one’s evil is made up with prejudice in the first place. A fallacy that is, incredibly sadly and incredibly primitively, still the base of most legal systems.

Don’t fall for it. There’s just some that want to make us hate each other, to exploit it for power. But people aren’t their stereotypes. People are just people. Be it sexes, ages, nations, peoples, or whatever. If you don’t listen to those who screech, they are literally powerless.

Sexist 1 (m): If you give me seven lines, written by the finest woman, I will find something to burn her as a witch.
Sexist 2 (f): If you give me seven lines, written by the finest man, I will find some mansplaining to destroy his life!
Sexist 1 (m): Oh, *you* can’t do that! Only I am rigtheous!
Sexist 2 (f): Not anymore, grandpa!
Sexist 3 (m): If you give me seven lines, written by the hand of the finest woman, I will find something to call her a feminazi!
Sexist 2 (f): Hey, *you* can’t do that! Only I am righteous!
Sexist 3 (m): Not anymore, grandma!
Sexist 4 (f): …
…
And so on, for all eternity, because apparently everybody’s too stupid and permanently mentally immature to learn a 5500 year old lesson and end the feud.

by Evi1M4chine March 24, 2024


Doomer

Slur, used by deluded livestock, against those who could save them, and in defense of their owners, to keep the facade up.

Refers to somebody who has enough life experience and intelligence, to not fall for the self-delusion of the domesicated human anymore, and realizes that humanity is factually a platentary pathogen of swarm lifeforms that already eradicated 50% of all species and is neither willing nor able to turn the ship around.

Contrary to popular belief (as opposed to observation), does not “accept” this status quo, nor has “given up”, nor “isn’t solution-focused”, but simply realized that humanity itself *is* the problem, and its self-eradication *is* the solution. (Even though it will take almost all life with it.

Also, can refer to people of all sexes, ages and colors.

So calling such a person a “doomer” only affirms the madness and thereby accelerates Earth towards this “refreshing athmosphere after the thundestorm”. Making it acually a compliment.

A new report comes out, that now 60% of all species, are extinct and the 2°C target cannot be met, guaranteeinf floods for half of all human settlements.
“Doomer”: Good. It will be over soon.
Pathogenic Drone 1: What’s her problem? All is well!
Pathogenic Drone 2: Dunno. We can do it! Our leaders will make wise decisions, and we will all work together in harmony to Kumbayaaa mahlord kumbayaa! All is well! *exaggerated fake happy face*
Pathogenic Drone 3: Yeah! Elon Musk Cyber AI Crypto Cloud will save us all, in just 3 months! The World Economic Forum promised! Let’s make children!*over-exaggerated creepily happy face*
Pathogenic Drone 4: She’s lust a doomer! A dOoOoMeErR! *rotates upper body backwards until it feela like it will make a 360° rotation* Yeah, let’s each make TEN children! There is no drought and no shortages! All is well!
Entire drone swarm: ALL IS WELL! ALL IS WELL! KUMBAYAAA! KUMBAYAA! *creepy happy smiles that don’t seem human anymore*
Everyonee proceeds as if all was well, breeding further human drones, full steam ahead into the abyss.

by Evi1M4chine May 15, 2023


sidin'

Taking a side on an entire topic (esp. political or religious), instead of rationally choosing the best combination of choices for one’s goals. Usually done by people that make a religion out of everything because they are not only unable to think it through, but unable to even become aware of that flaw.
The louder they’re sidin’, the more they are triggered, and the less of a clue they have.

Approaching them with logic and reality will only lead to self-defeat. (Ex. 1)

The ideal approach is to have a purely emotional conversation, treat them like four year old toddlers of a friend, without being condescending, be understanding without having to agree(!), gain their trust so they listen, find the origin of their fears (/triggers) and their wishes, and offer a separate path towards what’s attractive and away from what’s frightening to them. Only works if you let them keep/grow their self-respect, and let them do it on their own free will.
Easier said than done… obviously.

Also abused by wannabe dictators, to divide people and conquer them. (Ex. 2)
Can be seen in American politics, or any country, was the favorite strategy of Hermann Göring, but probably is as old as communication.
Ideally combined with a hopeful message that promises pride. (See: Hitler’s speeches.)
Turning enemies into friends as above also is at least as old as ancient China, as it was mentioned by Sun Tsu, IIRC.

Example 1:
Them: Toroccing is WRONG and the Quezquatals will hang in prishell!
You: But they made beautiful traianarjs, that saved so many children, and are an ancient part of our culture!
Them: No! Everything they do is shit! Why are you defending them??
You: Dude, we all literally have the same ancestors! Troccing never harmed anyone. Look here! Proposition 27q is literally giving you everything you said you wished for!
Them: OMG! You are with the Quezquatals that hate our valley and want to destroy it!!! WE are protecting our valley! Save the children! Kumbaya ma lord! *mentally loads shotgun* Those children deserved to die, praise Gollahvah! You are not with us, you deserve to die!
You: Dude… you’re SIDIN’! … Here, eat a Snockers.

Example 2:
WB: Quezquatals are attacking our very existence! Anyone who demands peace, hates Our Valley, exposes our children to rape, our cultuvement to extinction, and our homes to being burned! So follow us into a wonderful future of plenty and freedom!
The Moo: HAIL the great W.B.!
You: Gilly, don’t you know WB wants to perelish Willy that you always bought your candy from?
Gilly Moo: You hate Our Valley! Willy is a gaahk! Like all Quezquatals!
You: Filly, WB's promises are false! Look! He thinks you’re idiots!
Filly Moo: No, you’re lying! WB is only doing good, and you are only hating. E everything you say is evil and everything WB does is good.
Buddy of yours: WB ruined them. They’re SIDIN'. Nothing you can do about them now.

by Evi1M4chine December 6, 2022


valuation

When you make up some imaginary worth of you or somebody else, to trick people into giving you things you don’t deserve. Just like in the financial world, but for people instead of real or imaginary things.
Popular in dating, the job market, etc.

Bro A: My buddy here rescued a puppy from the animal shelter last week for his disabled son!
Bro B: Wanna come over and see my French wine collection?
Trusted friend: Nice valuation there! Except, you have literally a single BOX of wine, and there is no puppy at your abandoned son’s momma’s house! i know since I had to bring her food! So go hustle somewhere else, before I bring her over!

by Evi1M4chine March 10, 2024