Akon-oron

An oxymoronic statement that one says while trying to court a person of the opposite sex. Usually offensive, and usually said by the man to the woman. Inspired by the chorus to Akon's song "Sexy Bitch", wherein the singer says, "I don't mean to be disrespectful" and then proceeds to repeatedly refer to the woman in question as a "Sexy Bitch".

Indicative of:
a)How stupid men are
b)How stupid rap lyrics can tend to be

Guy: Hey
Girl: Hey
Guy: You look really pretty.
Girl: Thank you
Guy: I mean, I'm trying to be respectful, but goddamn you have the juciest ass ever.
Girl: Uhhhh...*walks away*
Guy: Dammit...I didn't mean to use an Akon-oron. Shit!

9👍 4👎

The Shaggy Defence

The defence favored by the protagonist in Shaggy's song "It Wasn't Me". Despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary, he maintains his innoncence by simply saying it was somebody else. Also liked by R. Kelly, O.J. Simpson, and Phil Specter

Person A: Oh, man, I just killed 2 dozen people. There were over 50 witnesses. My shirt was off and everyone saw my tattoo that says "My name is Jeffrey Dahmer". What should I do?
Person B: Say it wasn't you.
Person A: Oh, the Shaggy Defence...hadn't thought of that.

20👍 2👎

Celebriate

To party for the sole purpose of becoming intoxicated. Combination of the words "celebrate" and "inebriate".

Variations:
Celebriation
Celebriatory

My brother found $10 walking home from work, so we bought a handle with it and celebriated this stroke of luck.

6👍 6👎

Son of Man

A song by Phil Collins from the Tarzan animated movie. Will change your life.

Yeah, my cousin Petey fucked up a lot, but then he listened to "Son of Man". He's a priest now.

9👍 11👎