Gardner Time

The amount of time used to procure lunch for fellow co-workers. Unlike the rest of the English speaking, time telling world, Gardner Time operates on its own schedule with no rhyme or reason. In most cases you should double Gardner Time estimates to more accurately correlate with real world time keeping practices.

Good Guy: Hey guys, Ill pick up lunch today for everyone, Ill be back in about 25 minuets.

All: Crap - he uses Gardner Time, an hour later we are still wasting away with no food....
Good Guy: Sorry that took so long, I had to run by Carmax, get an appraisal, pick up coffee, solve world peace, got stuck behind an old person, and they only took cash at pickup..

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