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UVA

A University in Virginia that students attend in order to brag on a website about how good their school is. They typically do this in order to keep up their overinflated views of themselves while they sit in their apartment sipping on a fine glass of chardonnay, merlot, or Zima, as they have just finished their one hour of homework for the day.

Students of this false-Ivy League school enjoy the finer things in life, such as living off their parents' credit cards, driving expensive automobiles their parents bought them, going to dinner parties with strict dress codes, and wearing suits and bowties to sports that are traditionally viewed by fans wearing comfortable, utilitarian clothing such as T-shirts, sweatshirts, and jeans.

In addition, they promote Thomas Jefferson to an exalted level unseen by even avowed Libertarians, and insist on calling their rival school "Va-Tech," despite nobody else in the world, not even "Va-Tech" students, referring to the school by that name.

Asshole 1: "Hey, did you watch the football game the other day against Va-Tech?"

Asshole 2: "No, I was too busy getting wasted on three bottles of Zima at that big dinner party last night."

Asshole 1: "Ah, well we lost as usual, but all the babes were looking mighty fine in their pearls and sundresses! I impressed them with the $200 bowtie I bought last week with daddy's credit card. Oh well. At least we're still decent at all the sports that make no money for the school because the American public doesn't care about them."

Asshole 2: "Boy, I'm glad we go to UVA so we can be pompous assholes together!"

by FitShuck November 29, 2011

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