Joshoshoshborn

a fun loving goober who puts his values before everything . Always respecting his girlfriend , playing his sports, driving his daddy's work truck, and huntin', fishin', and loving every damn day. Pole vaults like a mexican tryna get over the border wall. Always looks like his life is flashing before his eyes in pictures. Pulled a 10 but he's a 20. Has 3 guns, one in his closet and two on his arms. That one party guy that never takes a sip but still has a good time, even though he ain't here for a long time. His idea of a romantic evening is Johnny Cash on the turntable and sipping on a root beer with his girlfriend, watching the sun set over some hay bales. Not only dresses country, but is country, which is the highest compliment one can receive.

He's SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Joshoshoshborn. He showed up half an hour early for our date, and then I was the envy of all the girls at Bingo Night because my Joshoshoshborn held the door, pulled out my chair for me, etc. I tell y'all, I didn't reckon I could fall this easy, but that was before I met a real JOSHOSHOSHBORN. He's daddy's favorite because he always gets me home before 8 o'clock.

Richard

A real dick

Wow! That's definitely a Richard!

Ricardo? i think you mean the italian dick!

1👍 17👎

Dylan

A tall, thicc boy. Always has a girlfriend because they perceive him to be aloof, when actually he is lazy as hell. Somehow has mild to moderate jawline despite his major source of exercise being thumb movement on xbox. Lungs contain the winds of the four corners of the earth, and always is able to burp. Likes his women like his KFC chicken: Yummy in the tummy and always on the bone. He is very callipygian. Has a timed schedule upon which he lifts shirt to air out his ENORMOUS areolas and pinpoint nips. FIN

He's SOOOO DYLAN! He lifted his shirt like 4 times on our date, and then burped down my throat when we kissed.

Pull a Sam Haynes

Injure oneself before an important race

Nate: I’m going skating
Barbera: don’t pull a Sam Haynes!

Threat lungs

A satirical twist on the well known phrase, “threat girl.” Threat lungs occur when you were so focused on avoiding your threat girls that you forgot to avoid your real enemy, the common cold.

Joey: Hey bro how’s it going with threat girl #6 this week?
Me: *cough* *cough* *sneeze* forget threat girls, I’m dealing with threat lungs.
Joey: NOT THE THREAT LUNGS!