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REMEMBER TO PUT A . AT THE END OF YOUR SENTENCE

Look at me putting a . at the end of my sentence

10👍 3👎

egg

Fragile but powerful.

Also very delicious.

We must bow down to the eggs.

Friend: Carries carton of eggs
Me: Better be careful, or else the deceased eggs will haunt you at night and become your nightmares

Inturesting

What is inturesting? That's an inturesting question.

Man: You just won the random lottery for 10 million dollars!!!
Me: Inturesting...

yawn

When you feel sleepy, you stretch out your arms and roar like an (armadillo)

Guy: Hey look I think Rick is gonna (yawn)
Rick: *ROARS LIKE AN ARMADILLO*

Shiitake Mushrooms

These mushrooms save you from swearing.

Pronounced Shih-talk-eee mush-rooms

Mom: Oops just dropped your phone and broke it.
Guy: SHIT
Mom: *stares*

Guy: TAKE MUSHROOMS
Mom: What?
Guy: I said shiitake mushrooms. I was buying some on my phone...