Edna, Texas

Edna, Texas is a small no-nothing town in south Texas, filled with plenty of rednecks and wannabe thugs. No one ever knows where the hell Edna is, even though “Stone Cold Steve Austin” grew up there. There ain’t shit to do in Edna except go to whataburger. All this little town has is banks for all the wealthy locals and farmers, and donut shops. The locals may try to sell you on the “charm” of their little town, but don’t let that fool you, because Edna is one of te snootiest small towns around filled with racist white shitheads everywhere, even though the town is made up of half of black and Hispanic folk.

Edna is also home to the Edna Cowboys, which everyone comes down to support every Friday night. Sports is #1 in Edna Texas because that’s all the budget can afford, apparently. So if you’re wanting to make something of your life that doesn’t involve some sports ball, Edna is not for you. However, if you’re interested in large rates of teenage pregnancy, Ol’ Edna has that covered to.

Old people love to come settle down in Edna to retire and die because what the hell else are you gonna do in Edna.

Person: “Where are you from?”
Me: “Edna, Texas”
Person: “Where???”

Me: “Exactly”

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