Gate Lice

Like nasty little bugs they clog up the 'follicles' of the gate boarding process. An itchy irritant that further fuels the stress of modern day air travel. They merge and swarm when anything is announced, even '10 minutes until we board' will draw out the most aggressive gate lice to hover around the boarding area, slowing everything down and infuriating considerate travelers.

Ive learned its also not always as simple as the lice being drawn by overhead luggage needs. After years of travel, I have learned that gate lice are a genetic form, not dissimilar to the steerage passengers of the past. The issue is not with them, (they will be drawn to an open gate like a moth to a flame) the issue lies with the airline who make the mistake of mixing such unsophisticated passengers with the noble, 1st class executive class.

You may have to get physical when wading through gate lice at a gate.

I hope we don't see too many gate lice today, they have been more agressive recently.

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