futu

1. (verb) Guernesias and Twatois for fucked.
Similiar to the French foutu. Most Guernsey people speak English the majority of the time and few know its literal meaning, "futu" is thus commonly used as a euphemism for knackered.

2. (noun) The name of a Guernsey satricial political cartoon strip: Guernsey Futu (this makes a pun that Guernsey is "knackered" or "broken", as well as "fucked", by its politicians)

Use 1a. "J'suis futu" (Guernsiase contraction of "Je suis foutu") - I am fucked. (lit)
1b. "I'm completely futu."

Use 2. "Did you see the latest FUTU?

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Muratti

A football competition played in the Channel Islands. Teams are usually Guernsey, Jersey, and Alderney.

Are you going to the Muratti Thursday, you?
Me, no, its to Jersey this time, it.

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Sex Guest

People who get invited to parties for sex.

Have you invited the sex guests?

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Leeroy Le Gallais

A "Leeroy" or more specifically a "Leeroy Le Gallais" is an insult meaning "someone who has sex with horses". It also is used to refer to someone who is a bit rurally simple, or generally used for "idiot".

The terms "a Leeroy", "doing a Leeroy" and "to be a bit of a Leeroy" etc, are easily confused with Leeroy Jenkins (who became infamous from World Of Warcraft for leaping headfirst into a situation regardless of strategy), hense the use of the full term "Leeroy Le Gallais". Usually the short version "a Leeroy" is used when context will suffice to explain.

The insult was born after public outcry in Guernsey when a Guernseyman hit national headlines when he was taken to court for molesting a horse (locals couldn't believe that some freak would actually do this, Guerns aren't all like him!)

"I think he's a bit of a "Leeroy Le Gallais" if you know what I mean."
"What are you, some kind of Leeroy?"
"He looks futu! I reckon he spent all last night Leeroy Le Gallaising"
"That mare looks like its been Leeroy Le Gallaised"
"You've got to remember - they're a bunch of Leeroy Le Gallaises!"

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Guernsey

1. One of the Channel Islands.
2. Better than Jersey hands down.
3. 60, 000 people clinging to a rock...
4. A breed of cow, white with toffee-coloured splodges
5. A type of knitted pullover

People from Guernsey are called Guerns or Gurns, or more officially Guernseymen or Guernesias/e. Most speak English (many very badly) with a few exceptional word and structure variations (eg "I'm to Vazon, me" - "I'm at Vazon").

1. "I'm going to Guernsey on holiday."
2. "Guernsey is better than Jersey at football"
3. "Its difficult to describe Guernsey..."
4. "This milk comes from Guernseys".
5. "My grandmother, she knits Guernseys for us each Christmas, her"

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