pooh shiesty

When you're out and you have to take a shit, so you go into a sit-down restaurant and tell them you're going to order but you need to use the bathroom first. Then you sneak out, tell them you're vegan if they press you.

"That chinese isn't sitting right with me... We're an hour away from my apartment and the only thing nearby is Ruths chris"
"You gotta take a pooh shiesty bro"

28👍 15👎

Shit Van Winkle

When you're in the bathroom trying so hard to take a shit that when you come out, you feel like its 20 years later

"Where have you been man?"
"I've been in the bathroom for the last two hours. What time is it? I thought the sun already set."
"It's only been 15 minutes. You had a shit van winkle"