animal rights

1. Someone who judges people based on names alone, immediately assuming someone with a name like “Billy-Bob” must be stupid. Also preaches a stereotypical and irrational hatred of southern society, often describing them as “ignorant and insecure individuals who are deathly afraid of any form of social change“. It is very possibly they promote other discrimination as well.

2. A movement to make the act of kicking punishable by death, as it is apparently as offensive as murder to them.

3. A movement to stop the trading of dogs in hopes that they will crap inside the homes of their owners, bringing disease into their homes, and cause a massive plague upon humanity.

NORMAL PERSON: High, my name is billy-bob. I just got my PhD and am on the brink of curing cancer.

ANIMAL RIGHTS ACTIVIST: Why don’t you drop another hydrogen bomb on the rain forest you stupid F*cking red neck!

BILLY-BOB: I can’t help it if this is what I was named! It’d be disrespectful to my parents to change my name.

ANIMAL RIGHTS ACTIVIST: Animals are dieing! You’ve murdered and tortured millions! I alone am clean of sin! (Stabs Billy-Bob)

BILLY-BOB: You’re a psychopath! Someone call the police!

ANIMAL RIGHTS ACTIVIST: Don’t try to silence us! This is just social evolution! WE ARE WEEDING OUT THE WEAK! MWAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!

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