wobbler

n. Anyone who has grown too old and infirm to continue at his trade or sport.

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Check out the wobbler playing hockey.

Can't read the writing on the wall.

Or anything else without his bifocals.

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lager hole

n. Rugby expression for a large gap through which one can run with the ball. The term has its roots in heavy drinking, as does rugby itself.

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Here now boyo. Wobble yer head a bit see, to throw them off kilter, and then plough up the lager hole.

I say. Spliffing idea old chap.

You're not English are you? It's Welsh we are. We hate the tommies.

Rather not my good fellow. Leeks rule! Etc.

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Rolling Stones Tour

n. Any over-priced wildly-publicised event of little actual importance.

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Are you going to watch The Masters this weekend?

No. It's just a Rolling Stones Tour. I'd rather wash my socks.

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Hobo supper

n. A gathering at which everyone provides an ingredient for a communal stew and an ingredient for a communal alcoholic beverage of epic strength.

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Hobo supper at the frat house tonight; are you in?

Does a chunder bucket have a handle?

howzat?

Interrogatory phrase expressing confusion and implying that something is seriously amiss.

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Downton Abbey is still on the air, along with American Idol and that Gilligan's Island contest.

Howzat?

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Perth

place. Semi-aquatic Australian city of almost mythological beauty. Tall spires arise from the surf's edge and mobile causeways transport tourists past the grist mills and anorak factories to wide white surf beaches calm enough for the kiddies.

Settled largely by Greek farmers rather than transported labourers, Perth became a magnet for muticulturism and sailing regattas as well as an oasis for the non-sporting types.

Iconic buildings such as the South Perth Magistrates Courthouse and the Wallaby enclosure at the Banamara Zoo dot the landscape and attract the bemused stares of visitors.

The America's Cup yacht race was once held near Perth but those heady days of glory are on hiatus just now.

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After a long trek across the Western desert it's almost comforting to see the spires of Perth in the distance.

Too right mate. Pass me some kangale from the grubsack

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wankle

n. Any part of the human anatomy that is particularly fine, or erotic.

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Hey now. Look at the wankle on that.

You are quite sexist. You know that, right?

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