goat parade

n. Any needlessly festive over-hyped celebration put on for the benefit of the organizers rather than the participants. Usually arranged by a government agency or a corporation to show that they are one with the people.

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Why all the bunting and balloons on Main Street? Did we finally win a war?

No. It's another goat parade. We're honoring finger-painters that have made a difference.

Will there be cake?

tux deductible donation

n. Money given to graduate or groom to help him defray costs of hi-jinks-related tuxedo damage.

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Who knew orange spray paint would not wash out?

Yeah. You should totally give Larry a tux deductible donation.

As if.

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olympic "athlete"

n. Any participant in an olympic event that obviously isn't a real sport, eg. ice-curling, luge, modern pentathalon. Often these people are smokers, out of shape, and Canadian.

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Hey! Hand me a Snickers bar! It's kind of boring out here on the curling rink. But at least I'm living the dream.

Here you go, eh, my olympic "athlete".

You didn't put air quotes around "athlete" did you?

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kang

n. Style, class. West coast skater term.

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Nice ramp hop dude! You got the kang.

'Deed I do.

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super bowl

n. Excellent full pipe of hash, opium etc.

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Dude! That super bowl on the weekend was superb!

I thought you didn't like football.

I don't.

coolers

n. Surfers rappers and others who think they is "cool".

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We all that!

Yeah, we coolers!

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peleton

n. The collection of average riders in a bike race who are just phoning it in.

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Okay, the leaders have rushed by, are we going to wait for the peleton?

How much wine is left?

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