thatcher

n. Person who promulgates divisive political theories.

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You support trickle-down economics? What a thatcher!

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howzat?

Interrogatory phrase expressing confusion and implying that something is seriously amiss.

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Downton Abbey is still on the air, along with American Idol and that Gilligan's Island contest.

Howzat?

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goat parade

n. Any needlessly festive over-hyped celebration put on for the benefit of the organizers rather than the participants. Usually arranged by a government agency or a corporation to show that they are one with the people.

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Why all the bunting and balloons on Main Street? Did we finally win a war?

No. It's another goat parade. We're honoring finger-painters that have made a difference.

Will there be cake?

draw wait

n. Ice curling term for the time required to broom the house before the pebble fades.

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Dude! What's the draw wait on sheet seven?

Four minutes. Don't hog this one, eh!

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coolers

n. Surfers rappers and others who think they is "cool".

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We all that!

Yeah, we coolers!

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Perth

place. Semi-aquatic Australian city of almost mythological beauty. Tall spires arise from the surf's edge and mobile causeways transport tourists past the grist mills and anorak factories to wide white surf beaches calm enough for the kiddies.

Settled largely by Greek farmers rather than transported labourers, Perth became a magnet for muticulturism and sailing regattas as well as an oasis for the non-sporting types.

Iconic buildings such as the South Perth Magistrates Courthouse and the Wallaby enclosure at the Banamara Zoo dot the landscape and attract the bemused stares of visitors.

The America's Cup yacht race was once held near Perth but those heady days of glory are on hiatus just now.

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After a long trek across the Western desert it's almost comforting to see the spires of Perth in the distance.

Too right mate. Pass me some kangale from the grubsack

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tux deductible donation

n. Money given to graduate or groom to help him defray costs of hi-jinks-related tuxedo damage.

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Who knew orange spray paint would not wash out?

Yeah. You should totally give Larry a tux deductible donation.

As if.

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