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Heather

Can be an amazing trickster of a female! She loves to share stories, especially any anecdote about her ex-husband or previous relationships. She loves to stretch every pair of yoga pants to the brink of splitting, and also leaves a solid impression after staying as a houseguest. For example, makes a literal bloody mess in the bathroom, stashes rib bones in the kitchen sink and packs wads of her box-dyed hair in the couch cushions.

She's a truly memorable human who's biggest energy expenditure, aside from pretending to jog in the morning, is dedicated to entertaining men other than her partner, posting catfish-like filtered selfies, and gaslighting any person who questions her credibility or self-proclaimed fantasticness. A rare find indeed, handle with care and be prepared to change to contact information if you get more than loosely acquainted with this type of female.

Did you hear all thirteen stories Heather told about her ex-husband when she visited our parents last weekend?

New York Heathers are whore-ish assholes with bad skin.

Guy says, "Man, Heather was sleeping with another dude the whole last year she's been seeing me!"
Friend says, "Kinda saw that coming, her name is Heather, after all."

by GotchaBialol July 31, 2023


Heather

Can be an amazing trickster of a female! She loves to share stories, especially any anecdote about her ex-husband or previous relationships. She loves to stretch every pair of yoga pants to the brink of splitting, and also leaves a solid impression after staying as a houseguest. For example, makes a literal bloody mess in the bathroom, stashes rib bones in the kitchen sink and packs wads of her box-dyed hair in the couch cushions.

She's a truly memorable human who's biggest energy expenditure, aside from pretending to jog in the morning, is dedicated to entertaining men other than her partner, posting catfish-like filtered selfies, and gaslighting any person who questions her credibility or self-proclaimed fantasticness. A rare find indeed, handle with care and be prepared to change to contact information if you get more than loosely acquainted with this type of female.

Did you hear all thirteen stories Heather told about her ex-husband when she visited our parents last weekend?

New York Heathers are whore-ish assholes with bad skin.

Guy says, "Man, Heather was sleeping with another dude the whole last year she's been seeing me!"
Friend says, "Kinda saw that coming, her name is Heather, after all."

by GotchaBialol July 31, 2023