Douche canoe

A person who has exceeded the levels of douche bag and is not quite douchey enough to be considered an asshole.

Guy 1: Carl is such a douche bag!
Guy 2: That's an understatement, he's a douche canoe!

Ermagherd

Pronounced er-ma-gherd, this is is an expression of shock usually used on terms of of fangirling. It has adapted from the phrase 'Oh my God'.

'Ermagherd ( insert band/fandom/ship)'

'MY OVARIES ARE GONE ERMAGHERD I CAN'T'

'Ermagherd I just'

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Hopysmotis

When someone sneezes on someone and that person does not notice or the person sneezing pretends it didn't happen. This can also be applied when someone sneezes in or on an object - the same rules apply.

'I did a stealthy hopysmotis in Charlotte's porridge this morning'