Twatter

A social messaging network for women only.

I've got to get on Twatter immediately to let the world know that I just scratched my left ass cheek.

47👍 27👎

Hialeah

The only city in the United States where the mayor can't speak English.

Jim: Hey, Gwok, take a ride with me to Hialeah...I need a translator.
Juaquin: I'm down, dude.

92👍 53👎

Guido grenades

Meatballs; specifically the large Italian type, as opposed to the smaller Swedish variety.

My grandmother was up all night making Guido grenades for my brother Sal's wedding reception.

5👍 7👎

Parking the Winnebago

Engaging in sexual activity.
Variation: "Parking the Winnebago in the back lot". Definition: Engaging in anal sex.

Vito: "Where the hell were YOU all night?"

Guido: "I was at Marie's house, parking the Winnebago."

4👍 1👎

Citi Field

The spectacular new home of the New York Mets, located at the border of Flushing and Corona in the Borough of Queens. The food is fantastic.

Citi Field makes Yankee Stadium look like a septic tank.

13👍 14👎

snot rocket

A particle of nasal excrement launched at such high speed as to achieve escape velocity. It may be launched by way of a sneeze, or the "cover one nostril and blow" method.

I still have flashbacks to the time in 7th grade when I was almost decapitated by my friend Carlos' snot rocket.

23👍 22👎

Derek Jeter

The Rear Admiral of the New York Yankees.

Derek Jeter used to be the Captain of the Yankees, but after Joe Girardi found him parking the Winnebago in Jorge Posada, he promoted him to Rear Admiral.

25👍 37👎