gantt chart

A very boring chart used in making pointless decisions, especially if you are a highly overpaid person to talk bullshit. It is more commonly used by youngters as a swear word or insult as the word "gantt", when shouted, sounds remarkably like the word "cunt"

Jethro: Do you like that new guy
Mitch: No I think he is such a gantt chart

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Reverse Self Irrigator

A delicate manoeuvre when one has just taken a dump and has come to a sudden realization that there is no toilet paper left. The Reverse Self Irrigator (or RSI) is when the dumpee bends his penis under his gooch and proceeds to piss into his crack, which then cleanses it. This move is exceptionally difficult for females as it requires a hosepipe or fishtank pipe in order to be performed. This can often be challenging as one must remember to block the penis whilst taking a dump in order to not lose valuable piss which will later be used to cleanse the asshole. If the dump is an afghani mud musket then you are in for a bad time.

Pat: Wow that dump was good
Mitch: How did you wipe, these gas stations never have toilet paper
Pat: No problem man, I just did Reverse Self Irrigator