New Buffalo

A sweet weekend and summer destination, most popular with Fucking Illinois People. The demographic can only be generalized by splitting New Buffalo at US-12. The water side is the fucking breeding ground for fips, where some hang in mass quantities at New Buffalo public beach, and where all fips in NB live. On the other side of US-12, the demographic is 100% creepy redneck (or locals). All of these shops are also 100% fips. One of the most popular events in New Buffalo, is the St. Mary of the Lake Fair or "the Carnival". This is where the FIPs and the locals meet each year, or at least the kids and teenagers. The envious locals watch the fips arrive in cars from slick-looking suburbans to Ferrari's, mixed in with the weekend crowds' Kia's, Toyota's and Hyundai's. Meanwhile, the locals have already bribed their cousins and/or parents (or the "Carneys"), with meth, to terrorize the otherwise amazing lives of fips. Occasionally fights break out, but when an African-American arrives on the scene, the FIP's and meth-heads unite on racism. Aside from these cultural conflicts headlined with teenagers, New Buffalo is a great place to be. Hey, even though his house was almost burnt down, Mayor Daley still lives here!

**FIP's**

Brooks: Timothy, to which mansion will you be jetting to this fine weekend, New Buffalo, the Hamptons, or perhaps Beverly Hills?
Timothy: Ah, well Brooks, I shall be taking the Bell 206 to our New Buffalo getaway, shall we play golf?
Brooks: Ah, indeed we shall. And Timothy, whose Rolls-Royce shall we take once we arrive in a matter of minutes from now?
Timothy: On the contrary Brooks, I have an exquisite new Bentley.
Brooks: Ah, splendid.

14👍 11👎