testicular banter

When the local doctor checks your prostate and it’s the exact same as his, and you both laugh it off casually.

Doctor - “Yo lemme check your scrotal mass”

Patient - “For sure homie! It’s on the health insurance so don’t be afraid to do some heavy examination”

Doctor - “ayoo bro we got the same”

Patient - “no way bro, that’s crazy”

~ Laughing it off while while realizing there is no diagnosis as of yet.

That is testicular banter in its raw form.

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Shrepokalypse

When you have all the Shrek memorabilia and it can’t protect you, then you know the Shrepokalypse has truly begun.

Watching the Shrek series will not save us. Unless we have a sidekick like Donkey, and our bodies can withstand enormous pressure from Shreks onions, then it is imminent death.

Bro : Yo bro did you see that green thing climbing the Eiffel Tower last night

Bro : no? Was it on CNN ?

Bro : yeah bro it was crazy that thing was like King Kong and hulk combined

Bro : damn bro that must’ve been Shrek. Prepare your body for the Shrepokalypse.

gandalf the black

That old crackhead who roams the hood freely with nothing but a pair of baggy Levi’s and a slight swagger in his step.

You can find him spewing mystical gibberish to himself in the local park. If you can decipher his strange grunts and noises, then you know your quest has only just begun.

There’s a Gandalf the white, and Gandalf the grey.

But have you met Gandalf the black ?

Schmood

A Schmood is an extremely contagious sexual mood or fantasy over someone.

It can last for 1-2 weeks and can also recur over the same person unfortunately. No one is immune to the “Schmood”

Yo bro I had a huge “Schmood “ over Carla and Ali the other day. It’s not good bro all I do is think about them. The curves entice me.

2 weeks later ~

Bro my schmoods gone I think. I hope...

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