helper shotgun

Similiar to a helper monkey, helper shotguns are put into use by disabled persons to perform tasks. However, unlike (most) helper monkeys, helper shotguns are also used to lay in the smack down on any disrespecting peeps.

That bitch didn't disrespect me after I brought out my helper shotgun.

3👍 3👎

helper monkey

A small monkey used to aid a disabled person. They are very well trained and perform such tasks as fetching food, turning lights on and off, and retrieving assorted small objects.

My helper monkey brought me the paper, breakfast, and my remote. It's so nice not to have to rely on other people for help.

23👍 4👎