Eckington School

A haven of "high"-achievers, where our proudest achievement is the "education" of Mini-Morgz and David Waring, who is running to become the dictator of Eckington in the May local elections.

Was going to be visited by Princess Diana, however some scallys (Prince Phillip & Queen Liz) nicked her exhaust manifold in Paris causing her to swerve into oncoming traffic in '97.
Used to be run by the Laird Patrick Cummings, however he succumbed to a fatal coup in 2018 led by Alison Burgess, who proceeded to instigate 3 devastating genocides on the school's special-ed department. Fortunately she herself was couped in 2020, beheaded by former army officer Nick J Melson (he was in the army once you know).
Since then, Eckington School has been racked by political instability and civil wars between rival headmasters, resulting in countless resignations and firings. This has been reflected in the UN's recent OFSTED report, ranking it below Yemen in its human rights rating. 20% of students are suffering from a water shortage, and the other 80% are in a constant state of flooding. It is reported that at least a third of Eckington students have lost at least one limb to the school's usage of landmines in an effort to prevent students standing on the grass.

After an attempt to provide the school with Humanitarian Aid by the Liberal Democrats, the school was deemed to dangerous an area to operate within, forcing the Lib Dems to retreate, vowing that "next we'll definitely win, we promise".

No, I don't want to go to Eckington School, I'd rather go to the Kabul Taliban School for Terrorists!