Bro-Soda

A Bro-soda is not just a beer. A beer becomes a Bro-Soda if and only if

1. The person drinking it is a bro, and

2. He is in the presence of at least one other bro, and

3. There are no females present.

If all three conditions are met, then beer undergoes a transformation. Its existence as bro-soda goes from being merely potential, to full actuality.

Ethics: The term bro-soda should never be used in the company of females. For example, if in the presence of a lady-infested party, one bro says to another bro, "Hey, can you grab me a bro-soda?" then he has alienated all the females in his presence. Then, when the bro is alone with the female, she will bitch and moan, causing the bro to return to bro-night with the need to complain about his lady-bro. This restricts the capacity for bro-night to get to its full potential (which usually involves forgetting about the lady-bros).

Bro 1: "I'm thirsty."

Bro 2: "Have a bro-soda!"

Bro 1: "I Love Natty Lite!"

9👍 2👎

Lady-Bro

In short: a lady-bro is a bro's girlfriend who is also chill and can participate in bro-night, pending approval by the other bros.

Further exegesis:
A lady-bro is, first and foremost, chill. She is able to hold her own in the company of all males. She can relate to conversation at bro-night and can even offer further stimulation to the gathering. However, this characterization is not sufficient for the definition of a lady-bro!

She is more than just a girl who is refreshingly easy to hang out with. She is the girlfriend of a bro who is ALSO easy to hang out with. That is, she is allowed to come to bro-night and drink some bro-sodas (though whether the term bro-soda can be used in her presence is debatable--see entry for bro-soda).

Bro 1: I brought my girlfriend to bro-night!

Bro 2: Is she ready to shotgun a beer?

Bro 1: Hell yeah!

Bro 2: Bring her in!

Lady-Bro: Where's the beer!?

36👍 10👎