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Kerry ball

In bowling, a strike in which not all ten pins fall at the same time. Usually nine pins fall, while the last pin wobbles around then falls a second or two later.

Jordan: I have 2 strikes in a row. Now I'm going for a turkey... {bowls}... {sees 9 pins fall and turns around}... Oh, crap, I missed!

Leaira: KERRY BALL!

Jordan: Hey, I got a turkey!

by Jordan_17 September 10, 2011


Theel blob

A blob of joint compound or spackling compound that has been painted over without sanding it smooth to blend in with the wall.

When you patch holes in drywall, you need to sand the compound smooth to blend in with the wall before painting over it. Otherwise, you will leave behind an ugly mess over the patched area, called a Theel blob.

Jordan: Hey, Dad, I would like to paint my room a different color.
Dad: OK, but you're gonna have to do it yourself. I'll buy the paint and other stuff you need, but I'm not doing any of the work.
Jordan: Thanks, Dad! And that's OK, I know how to do it myself. I'm even gonna patch a bunch of holes and dents in the walls.
Dad: OK. Just make sure you sand the compound really well after it dries. I don't want to see any Theel blobs.

by Jordan_17 September 5, 2011


Great Awakening

The harsh reality that hits an Applehead, Machead, iFool, or other Apple fan like a ton of bricks the moment he or she realizes that their iPod, iPad, iPhone, or Mac computer is not the crash-proof and bullet-proof wonder device that Steve Jobs and his overhyping media make it out to be.

This is usually brought on the very first time that a Mac computer freezes up, crashes, and needs to be restarted (usually causing the user to lose a lot of unsaved documents), or an iPod, iPhone, or iTunes software locks up or otherwise malfunctions.

Leaira: Did you hear what happened to Brittany?
Jordan: No, what happened to her?
Leaira: Well, she just experienced the Great Awakening.
Jordan: Oh really!? Her iPod quit working?
Leaira: It sure did! She picked it up and tried to listen to her music, and it just gave her an Apple logo and wouldn't do anything else. That's not all -- her MacBook froze up and crashed last week, and she can't get it to boot up anymore.
Jordan: Wow! That's too funny! So much for Crapple products being crash-proof and bullet-proof! What is she gonna do?
Leaira: She's had it with Steve Jobs, his lies, his media overhyping, and outragrous prices. She says she's going to take a sledgehammer to all her Crapple junk, throw it in the iGarbage can, and buy some good products.
Jordan: Oh, that's cool! What is she gonna get?
Leaira: She just bought a Windows 7 64-bit laptop the other day. She loves it! It works a lot better than her Macintrash ever did. And at half the price!
Jordan: Awesome! I think I'll get one too. What about her music player?
Leaira: We're going shopping today. She's just gonna get a basic MP3 player like mine. I love mine, and it only cost $50. It works directly with Windows with no iTunes or anything. I just drag and drop my MP3 files thru Windows. And it's a lot easier to use than her iPod ever was.
Jordan: That's awesome! Glad to hear she's finally kicking Crapple to the curb!

by Jordan_17 August 24, 2011

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