gooch gardener

Someone who, by trade, crops and maintains the area between ones sack and colon.

Person 1: Ive been eating a whole lot of just the gravy rolls lately and the explosive diarrhoea has not only wrecked my porceline, its getting stuck in my wildly untamed gooch hairs
Person 2: You should call a gooch gardener, he'll have you as hairless as a korean ping pong tong player's calves in no time

Robbing one out

When you are overcome with excitement at seeing DJ Rob live that you are forced to masturbate

Friend 1: Hey I heard about your break up, what happened?
Friend 2: My girlfriend caught me Robbing one out just before heading down to the local