I have to text my pig

A modern version of "I have to wash my hair" or "I have to sort my sock drawer"; an obvious excuse and serious blow off that can be employed when standing in front of the person asking you to do something you don't want to do.

Girl: So we're going to Bar 123 after this; do you want to come with us?
Guy: Aw, I would but I have to text my pig.

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