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vomit shirt

This item of clothing maybe gifted, purchased new or acquired used at a thrift store. At first it may look like a Jackson Pollock painting gone wrong and the atrocious nature of its appearance draws you to it like moths to a flame. Looking at it on a hanger generally causes feelings of nausea and disbelief. It’s like watching a train wreck… You can’t look away. The magic happens when you try the shirt on. Through some sorcery unknown to The general population the appearance of the shirt changes once on the body and becomes strangely appealing and attractive. Even the most strong-willed people will not be able to resist the urge to purchase it and add it to their wardrobe. Quickly it will become the favorite shirt of the person who owns it and many tears will be shed when it reaches the eventual state of disrepair that where it can no longer be worn in polite society and must be relegated to use as a part of a zombie costume or turned into dust/shop rags.

Hey, Dave; nice vomit shirt! Did you get it at Macy’s or Goodwill?

by Kavanor June 9, 2021