Doucheweed

An obnoxious, self-absorbed assfuck with a low intelligence quotient, the reputation of a two-faced backstabbing curmudgeon, and a pretentious, often God-delusional, sense of self-worth. A doucheweed almost always has an exceptionally small penis, demonstrates terrible character, expresses polarizing political views, and tells everyone the worst secrets told by "friends" in good faith. More often than not, a spoiled, pretentious rich white teenager.

Wesley: Yes, absolutely, I completely believe that the recent attempted assassinations in Arizona were an acceptable expression of political dissent.
People: God, what a doucheweed!

Wesley: (Car stopped by a police officer) Sir, what is your probable cause?
Officer: Get out of the car and get naked you little doucheweed, I am calling in the drug dogs.
Wesley: If there is weed in my car, it's Catherine's fault.
Catherine: You doucheweed, I don't do drugs! YOU DO! Don't blame YOUR drug problems on your GIRLFRIEND.
Wesley: Shut up and take the blame bitch, I am going to succeed in life at the cost of your FREEDOM.
Narcotics Officer: Weed found, both of you are going to jail.
Police Officer: That's what you get you little doucheweed! Sorry that you're dating such an ASSFUCK Catherine!
Catherine: (Sobbing) ME TOO!!!