Narni-ock

The fantasy world/ secret dimension where all missing socks go following a complete cycle in the dryer, never to be seen again. Frequently will happen to favorite or new pairs.

Friend #1: "Kevin put his favorite pair of dress socks in the dryer and only one came out. Now he has a drawer full of socks and none of them match!"

Friend #2: "It must have passed into the Kingdom of Narni-ock"

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Assholephrenia

What should be a clinical diagnosis for a person who has all the bravado of a Mensa member, but the substance of a meringue, and an I.Q. that rivals that of a 10 watt lightbulb. Often looks for a reason to complain, criticize, sabotage or simply act like a douchebag with no provokation.

My ex-girlfriend got mad after I cheated on her, kicked her dog, called her mom fat and stole her car.

Doctor: You have a condition known in psychiatry as Assholephrenia.

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Maunt

Man-aunt; An extremely masculine female with dark and unusually thick, course facial hair. An aunt who is not married, always wants kisses from young nieces/ nephews but raises many questions among family members regarding her actual gender.

Maunt Jo' is coming to Christmas dinner this year?

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