houseband

The male equivelant to housewife. In this case, a houseband stays at home and takes care of the kids while the wife works.

While claire works her ass off at work, Jimmy drinks beer while watching t.v. with his kids. Jimmy is obviously a houseband.

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postmodem depression

The feeling you get when you haven't had access to the internet (i.e. facebook and twitter) for a long time, like several minutes.

(A family is on vacation)
Mom: Johnny, come to dinner!
Johnny: Fucking not hungry!
Mom (to dad): What the hell is wrong with him?
Dad: He's got postmodem depression; he can't update his facebook status.
Mom: But we have only been here for 15 minutes.

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cocked blocked by Bill Gates

Unable to receive the sexual pleasures from someone because he or she is too busy dealing with the problems of his or her's PC.

Johnny (to his best friend): Yo, so did you get laid last night?

James: Nah, my booty call got ruined when her PC got a virus.

Johnny: hahaha, you got cocked blocked by Bill Gates! you should've bought her that Mac like I told you to!

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