Man-Nipples

A term to use for one that is useless.

Cunt 1: “That cunt is as useful as ‘Man-Nipples’“
Cunt 2: “not only useless, he’s annoying as Fuck”
Cunt 1: “Yeah, ‘Marathon Rash Man-Nipples’

Bro’s-w-Benefits

Gay Brothers that spend a lot of time together behind closed doors. Quite often noises are heard from within that can be associated with gurgling, dry reaching & only what could only be described as 2 fish being slapped together in a fast rhythmic motion.

Father: “damn those boys enjoy each other’s company”
Mother: “It’s beautiful the bond they share together”
Father: “Sometimes when they are playing GTA5 together in their bedroom it sounds like they are sharing more than a bond”
Mother: “What are you saying?”
Father: “I’d swear those gay CUNT’s are fucking each other”
Mother: “Don’t be stupid, they’re brothers”
Father: Yeah, ‘Bro’s-w-Benefits’

5👍 1👎

Sibling Fucklery

Siblings that fuck each other. Brothers on Sisters, Sisters on Sisters, Brothers on Brothers, Brothers on Brothers while their Uncle watches from the closet.

Setting: Father of 2 daughters at bar with a friend.
Father: “I walked in to my oldest daughters room Late last night to borrow her iPad & witnessed both of my daughters in bed in the ‘69’ position. WTF???
Friend: “Sounds like you’ve got a case of ‘Sibling Fucklery’

sterndriving

Similar to ‘Motorboating’, ’Sterndriving’ is the fine art of placing ones face between the arse cheeks of a willing (or non willing) participant & shaking vigorously side to side while blowing a raspberry.

Scene: 2 mates waking up on a couch after a night of beer, tequila & cocain
Old Mate 1: “Wow, my face feels like I’ve had a night of ‘Sterndriving’ Beyoncé”.
Old Mate 2: That’s nothing, my arse feels as if I’ve been ‘Sterndriven’ by the lead singer of Aerosmith.
Old Mate 1: “............I think we better ease up on the coaxing next time”