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Random
The main objective on a guys night out. To wrangle is to round up. A Ho is a loose woman.
A ho wrangler is a guy with massive easy girl pulling potential, who rarely ever spends a night alone, or with the same person more than twice.
A night of ho wrangling consists of bankrupting yourselves by buying numerous shots for women who are waiting at the bar, hoping that one might want to shag you. You will also dance in a grinding motion behind several women, in an attempt to wrangle them.
Vic's stag night is going to be a full on ho wrangling experience.
8π 2π
1) Discarded, half eaten kebabs that are strewn through the streets near bars after 2am at weekends.
2) Oral sex performed on someone in a park/carpark/shop doorway. A person does not necessarily have to be a tramp to perform or receive Tramp Nosh but it is reasonable to assume that at least one participant may be, due to the scabby choice of location.
1) "I can't eat this doner, I'm gonna puke. Do you want it?"
"Nah, throw it down, man. Let it become tramp nosh."
2) Claire regretted her choice to remain sober and be the designated driver as soon as she approached her car and noticed, all too clearly, the gentleman reclining against it, recieving an enthusiastic tramp nosh from a woman in pink pvc and hair glitter.
To Hit the high "C" is to make the high pitched noise emitted by a man who has just been injured in the genital area. It's a note easily achieved by choir boys and opera singers, but most men will only ever manage to attain such highs when they've sustained a blow to the bollocks.
To induce this noise in a gentleman, use reasonable force when striking the area. Note- REASONABLE force. Excessive force will result in no sound, as the note emitted will be too high for even dogs to hear, or he'll be unconscious, which is no fun for anyone.
"I accidentally elbowed Finn when I went to grab my handbag off the floor. He really hit the high "c", it was hard not to laugh"
"Ferdinand with a very good interception cleanly takes the ball away from CissΓΒ©. Now Gerrard comes dancing in like a fairy and oh! It's a kick to the balls from Ferdinand! And there's Gerrard, on his knees, having just hit the high "c""
24π 2π
Like Secret Santa in that one person delivers something to another, and the recipient was unaware that it was heading their way. Except that the delivery is not a Christmas gift, it's an epic bollocking.
1) One of your friends or family will ultimately humiliate you and make you want to die on the spot. Secret Sergeant encompasses the art of working out which one of the fuckers it will be, eg- one of them is secretly waiting to tear you to shreds, Sgt. style, and the rest of them probably know about it.
2) If you're quietly waiting for the best moment to crush your friend's/lover's/sister's or otherwise acquainted or related person's world, and you have discussed it with others, you are the Secret Sergeant. The way you get your kicks is by not being discovered by your intended target, and getting that moment of sweet, sweet satisfaction when the unsuspecting person falls apart before your eyes. A good Secret Sergeant could wipe the smile off a leprechaun's face.
"One of them is going to go all Secret Sergeant about me running off to vegas and getting married....I need to know which one it is"
"He cried his eyes out. He didn't even see it coming, and I didn't care for his weak and pathetic tears. I went totally Secret Sergeant on him!"
18π 2π
Cum that was expelled through masturbation, ie- "Jacking", and has not been cleaned up, allowing it to go shiny and slightly crisp, like cake frosting.
Typically found in teenagers bedrooms, although fully grown men that have wank addictions have been known to jack frost their carpet on a regular basis.
Danielle thought she had hit the jackpot with Steven. He was kind, considerate, and seemed to be very house proud. She relaxed happily on the sofa, thinking about how great her relationship was- until she noticed the Jack Frosting on one of the cushions.
38π 14π
1) Girls who indulge in girl on girl action when surrounded by girls only. Despite being hetero, they get their jollies the gay way, rather than have no action at all. Common in students at all girls boarding schools.
2) A girl who announces she's gay when being chatted up by a bloke she finds repellent.
3) The heterosexual emo females, who believe that gayness=coolness and therefore have all been gay/are currently gay/will be gay very soon but will embrace their genuine sexuality when that is in fashion.
1) I first had sex when I was seventeen, if you don't count the two years in which I attended Roedean and was a convenient lesbian.
2) Phil decided to go home after being shot down by the fifth convenient lesbian of the night.
3) Those emo girls aren't actually gay, you know. They're just convenient lesbians. Next week they'll be into pre-op transexuals to coincide with the latest reality tv show.
13π 1π
1) To give someone the hard eye is to look at them with disapproval/disdain/dislike. You give someone the hard eye when you don't know them- you just know you don't like them. Like when someone won't stop swearing when you've got small children with you. That merits a serving of hard eye.
2) To appraise something critically. One assumes that aspiring models are given the hard eye when they apply to an agency. It's when you look for things to dislike rather than things to like.
1) The mouthy teens on the bus continued to talk at deafening volume and play offensive rap music on their mobile phones, despite being given the hard eye by 90% of the passengers.
2) After giving Vanessa the hard eye as she walked to the loo, Doug decided he wouldn't be taking "her" home after all.
21π 2π