Snakebook

The use of Facebook to snake your way into somebody's undercrackers, preferable tactic is to stitch up somebody else you know to be interested in the female (probably your best mate) and put yourself in the frame instead.

That little git Neil has just slid in on Snakebook and hijacked that bird I was tapping up.

Oh well, she had a face like a dropped meat pie anyway...

26👍 11👎

Female Apology

The ancient and still present artform of a female getting something completely wrong but never actually being able to apologise for it.

Instead they will just be nice to you for a prolonged amount of time hoping that they'll make you forget about their faux pas without being humbled enough to say "Sorry".

So how did it go last night?

It was OK, I didn't get an apology.

How is that OK, she was completely out of line!

It's OK because I got the female apology, enjoyed the lack of nagging so much I forgot why I was mad at her in the first place.

40👍 26👎

Think Wank

A wank achieved with no aid other than your own memory or imagination.

A power cut is no problem, so long as you have the power of the Think Wank.